Monday, May 24, 2010

Make Loads of Cash by Creating an Economic Bubble

Everyone knows about the housing bubble that burst sometime in 2008 and caused the major worldwide financial crisis that is more or less still ongoing. Most people still remember the dotcom bubble that built up during the late 1990s and then burst in 2000. Bubbles occur frequently in most economic systems, and cause significant economic growth for a few years before causing significant economic havoc for a few years. Kind of like teenagers. Because of the crash that always occurs after a bubble bursts, most people have come to regard bubbles as bad.

And bubbles are bad. But they don't have to be bad for everyone. The trick is to get in at the beginning of the bubble and then get out before it breaks. Most people understand this, but very few are very good at predicting where and when a bubble will occur. This is because most people try to ride the markets rather than trying to influence the markets.

But this kind of thing is actually easy to do. If you are good with computers you can swamp a stock exchange with automated bogus trades until the artificial trade volume is noticed by real day traders. These investors will then buy into the market, believing that the stock running up. You can control the price with your bogus trades until it reaches a point where you want to sell your real holdings. Then you drop the fictitious trades and move to a different stock, or sector. 

Its extremely illegal, but would be very difficult to track. Brokers who work at large financial institutions could very easily do it, and probably do.

But what if I'm not good with computers and automated trading?

You're in luck. Howtomakeadollar has a good solution for people like you.

1. Buy a major stock exchange such as NASDAQ or NYSE outright
     A. This may require a lot of up front cash, possibly as much as $100.00
     B. You may be able to get a used stock exchange off Craigslist for less, but you will have to shop

2. If you don't have enough up front cash to buy a stock exchange, you can start your own.
     A. The best way to create a stock exchange is to get a string of letters together that end in "EX" which is short for "exchange." Lets say you choose "FARTEX"
     B. Once you have chosen the name of your exchange you will need to do a bunch of other stuff that involves trading stocks and options and mutual funds. I don't know how to do any of this, but I think there are a bunch of unemployed finance people in New York who may be able to help you out.

3. Good. Now you have your own stock exchange. (This is not a real step per se, its just a good stopping point to look back on what you've accomplished so far. You are doing great)

4. Now you need to cause lots of people to buy certain kinds of stocks. Lets say you want to create a bubble in the mulch and wood chips industry.

5. Everytime someone buys or sells a mulch stock on FARTEX, you need to rig it so that the order goes through as a "buy," even if the client ordered a sell. The best way to do this is to create an automated trading system and then add a glitch. From my own personal experience in designing software I can tell you that I am one of the best people in the world at making glitches. If you need a good software glitch, my services are available. This will cause demand to go really high really fast, creating a mulch bubble.

6. Once the price gets to a certain ridiculously inflated amount, you should sell all of your mulch stocks. "What mulch stocks?" you ask. Well, to be honest, I forgot to add a step in which I told you to buy a bunch of mulch stocks for cheap. You will lose big if you forget this step. Maybe I should have mentioned this in step 3 instead of wasting it, or maybe there needs to be a new number between 3 and 4. Someone at the Federal Dept. of Numbers should be working on this.

7. Make sure your sell order goes through as an actual sell, not a buy. You will have to fix the glitch to do this.

8. Now you are rich, so you should be able to afford to buy a bunch of online poems for your family, friends, and spouses. I know a good place that sells these.

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