Monday, May 17, 2010

How to make a dollar by starting your own fat kid camp

It's official... people in America are FAT.  Especially kids.  And the only people we should blame are the evil, horrible, capitalistic, giant corporations who are bringing us down.  Since the writers of How To Make A Dollar are sponsored by McDonalds, we are not able to specifically talk bad about the wonderful goodness that McDonalds embodies.  But since we are not sponsored by Burger King... we can talk bad about them.  Burger King is the reason American kids are FAT.  (we also do not like the scary Burger King guy)

Since the largeness of our youth is continuing to increase we need to do something about it.  Good thing Barack Obama's wife is doing something about it...

Step by Step Business plan for starting your own Fat Kid Camp (FKC)

Step 1: find really big building for little to no money.
How To Make A Dollar likes to work out the details of our business plans to help our readers out.  So, we have located such a building for you.

This building is located in Bramwell, WV.  It is an old high school that is for sale.  The building is 80,000 sq. ft.  That sure can fit a lot of Fat Kids.  It is for sale for only $495,000.  That is a ridiculous ~$6 per sq. ft.  Amazing.  You can see the full listing here.

Step 2: Get money from the government.  This seems to be the cool thing to do these days.  Since Michelle Obama is fighting fat kids I'm sure it is easy to secure a government grant.

Step 3: Ship a lot of over weight kids to your 80,000 sq. ft. compound for a month during the summer.  Have their parents pay you a ton of money!

Step 4: Give the kids a proper amount of food and exercise.  They will lose weight.  But make sure it is not too much weight... you want them to come back every summer.

Step 5: Franchise an ice cream store across the street and be open from 2:00am to 5:00am every night.  Make sure you conveniently unlock the doors to the 80,000 sq. ft. compound at this time.

Step 6: Only work a couple of months out of the year.  The rest of the year you can hang out in your compound and do whatever you want.

1 comment:

  1. "Hang out in your compound!"That's hilarious! I've heard the food at those camps is pretty basic and isn't even very good so you probably wouldn't have to splurge on nice, organic products unless you wanted to market it that way.

    Check out today to see Mrs. Obama at a local school.


Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...