Sell things you can get for free!

The best business model in the world: Sell something that you get for free!  There is no better business model.  

There is a lady that makes $40,000 a year selling tumbleweed.  Yes, tumbleweed.  She goes in her back yard (somewhere in kansas) picks up the tumbleweed and sells it.  Its true.  Our OFCG can check me on that one... or you can click here.

So, go out in your backyard (if you have one) and look for something that you can get for free.  Options of things you can get for free: grass, dirt, acorns, squirrels, air, rocks, branches, pine cones.  Collect the free items and sell them online.  Easy!

Make Money by Smashing Atoms

Every now and then Howtomakeadollar sees something in the news about a gigantic atom smasher in Europe called the "Large Hadron Collider". Recently the thing supposedly recreated the Big Bang somewhere near Geneva. I would have thought that this would have caused a certain degree of disruption around the universe, but apparently it was just a very small big bang, and did not shred the space-time continuum or cause the universe to catch on fire. Aside from those details, everything else was pretty much the same as the original bg bang. You can read about this machine here. However, this is not my main point.

Before I get to the main point I would like to say that I really don't understand the appeal of spending $10 billion on a machine that "smashes" atoms. What do they have against atoms? Are they not small enough already? Too many of them? 

Atom Smashers: Because atoms suck. Thats why.

In any case, scientists hate atoms, and take great joy in smashing them into infinitely small little bits. Of course, atoms are already infinitely small, so again, I don't get it. Howtomakeadollar has several solutions for you to make money as a personal atom smasher for the European mad scientists. Remember, they spent $10 billion on a big machine, so this is a very lucrative business.

Best way to make money smashing atoms

1. Get a hammer

2. Find an atom somewhere.

^{3. Hit the atom with the hammer}

4. Make sure scientists are watching

5. Collect money.

I'm pretty sure that hammers can smash several million atoms at one time. For that matter, hammers can smash pretty much anything, so it is good to have a few around at all times in case you need to smash stuff.

Second best way to smash atoms

1. Find Chuck Norris

2. Tell him that an atom has insulted his mother

3. Stand back

4. Make sure scientists are watching

5. Collect money

Atoms live in fear of Chuck Norris. Thats why no one has ever physically seen an atom anywhere near him. He is practically a black hole, except he knows how to kick people really hard, which black holes don't.

Make Money by Panning for Gold

Gold is very expensive right? Everyone knows this. Right now an ounce of gold costs about $1,100 dollars. I don't really know how much an ounce is, but I know that an ounce of cardboard is worth a lot less, and an ounce of feathers probably weighs a lot less. 

The real thing that you are interested in is how to find gold. It is one thing if you can sell the gold you already have, but if you can find more gold, then you will get rich. Like the old saying goes "give a man a piece of gold, and he will eat for a day, but teach him to go fishing, and something about gold"

Here is how to find gold:

1. Get a pan out of the kitchen cabinet.

2. Drill some holes in it.

2. If your wife asks questions about this, just tell her to relax and leave you alone because you know what you are doing. She will appreciate your forthrightness.

3. Go to the mountains.

4. Stick the pan in a river

5. Shake the pan around for a while until gold comes out.

6. If someone asks you what you are doing, say "not looking for gold." Otherwise a gold rush might take place, which, I think, had something to do with the "Wild West" last time, and the wild west was bad.

7. When you find gold, sell it to someone

8. Repeat steps 1-7 repeatedly

Reason No. 1 why you shouldn't start a gold rush

Congratulations to Grant L.

Congratulations to the winner of the 2010 Best Guest Bloggers Blogfest blog-off!  Way to go Grant L.  You are the winner!!!!!!

If you missed it, here is the winning blog.

Your grand prize will be delivered to you shortly.  Thank you to all of the other wonderful participants and voters.  Start writing your ideas down now so you can participate in 2011.

Your blog makes Matt Damon smile!

Make Money as a Security Guard

Here is how you can make money as a security guard:

1. Find a large business park.
2. Commit lots of crimes such as vandalism, arson, and dropping cats on people's heads from above.*
3. Get a business card that says "I am an excellent security guard and am extremely proficient in apprehending people who commit vandalism, arson, and who drop cats on other people."

4. Give the card to whoever is in charge of the place. I have no idea who is in charge of business parks. You will have to ask around. Just approach people and say "Who is in charge around here?"
5. Wait around for them to hire you as a security guard.
6. In the meantime, continue committing crimes
7. If they do not offer to pay you enough, just say no, and then go commit more crimes. Soon they will offer more.

*I don't know if this is an actual crime or not, but it should be. There is no real defense if someone drops a cat on your head, so if you work at a business park, I recommend wearing a hockey mask at all times. This causes the cat to bounce off without clawing out your eyes and provides the added benefit of looking scary.

Would you drop a cat on this guy's head? 

Alcidae Consulting LLC

Alcidae Consulting 



Alcidae Consulting LLC is a fabulous company to help take your business to the next level.  Alcidae Consulting LLC will help refresh your image with one of there many services.  Their services include full service marketing, web design, graphic design, market research, branding, sales training, and software development.

Alcidae Consulting LLC has over five years of experience in helping companies succeed.  They are based out of Reston VA and would love to help you!  Visit their website or contact them through phone or email.


Alcidae Consulting 
Cait von Schnetlage
703.485.6934
Cait.vonschnetlage@gmail.com


Promote your business with our new PromoteME feature. 

PromoteME!

Howtomakeadollar would like to introduce you to our latest feature.... PromoteME!  PromoteME is a chance for you to have your business, website, and/or blog promoted by us.  Our enormous reader base and strong ability to promote businesses makes us the best choice to promote your company or website.  The promotion can be yours for a low price of $1.

If you would like to promote your business on our blog, email us and put in the subject line PromoteME!  We will put together a blog featuring your website or business.  We guarantee you will generate at least one new unique hit on your website.... or your money back.  One new unique visitor to your website could be worth a lot more than $1!

How to make a million dollars on the stock market

Making a million dollars on the stock market is actually a lot easier than most people think. There are dozens of ways to do it, but I am going to show you a couple of the easiest and most fool-proof techniques

Idea No. 1: Make a million dollars on the stock market by using a time machine
This is definitely the easiest way to make millions on the stock market. All you need to do is get in a time machine and go back to like 1968 and invest about $5,000 in stocks in McDonalds. Then move back to the present and sell them. If you do this, you will actually have slightly more than $1 million.

If you don't have a time machine, you can rent one from Howtomakeadollar, or you can buy an "E-Z Do-it-Yourself Time Machine Kit" from us. Rentals cost $1, and kits cost $10 (plus $.44 shipping).

Pros: 

1. You get to hang out with people in the sixties, which sounds like fun*
2. You can tell "future jokes" that no one will get, but then, several decades later, they will.
*Things to do while hanging out in 1968:
1. Witness the Martin Luther King assassination (-100)
2. Witness the Robert F. Kennedy assassination (-100)
3. Get kicked around by cops while participating in race riots (-100)
4. Fight in the Vietnam War (-100)
5. Watch the first episode of "One Life to Live" (+500) ("One Life to Live" is the official favorite show of Howtomakeadollar)
totals: -400 +500 = +100. 
Conclusion: 1968 is a +100 year. It was awesome!


Cons:
1. You need to come up with $5,000, which may require you to get a job for a few months.

Idea No. 2: Make a million dollars on the stock market by buying into the Howtomakeadollar Mutual Fund (HDMF).
1. Send us a bunch of money. The more the better, but any amount is good.

2. Wait around for a while.
3. In the mean time, go ahead and send us more money
4. We will take care of the rest.

Happy Birthday Paul!

Happy Birthday Paul (aka Dad, Papa Paul)

We hope you have a wonderful day on your Birthday!  Thank you for being such a wonderful father and friend.  We appreciate everything you do.  Thank you for working hard, being a spiritual leader, a loving and fun grandfather, stock advisor and friend.

We love you very much!
Love,
The Glenn Family!

You too can show your love!

Big Ball Rolling for Family Entertainment

A very good way to make money is to create an entertainment facility that provides fun for families. People will come to your facility with their kids and pay you money to entertain themselves by doing menial and unimportant tasks. You don't have to do anything. Just build the facility and then charge people money to come use it. A good example of this is mini golf.

Howtomakeadollar is pleased to announce another good idea. We call it "Big Ball Rolling for Family Entertainment." In this game, each participant gets a big heavy ball, and they have to roll it a long distance toward a set of poles that are standing up longways. The goal is to knock all of them over. Whoever knocks the most over wins.

Now, you are probably thinking "that does not sound very fun." Well, you are right. Its not very fun. But remember, your biggest competition is mini-golf, so it doesn't have to be fun. The key is that it is something that families can do together. Fun is not really a key element of this idea's success. "Family togetherness" is what you are going for. No one expects it to be fun.

Here are some additional suggestions that could make your Big Ball Rolling Center more profitable.

- Make all participants rent shoes from you before they are allowed to play. The shoes should be cheap, and do not have to be comfortable or smell good. Just charge two or three dollars for shoe rentals. People won't think to ask why you are doing this. They will just be glad that their kids are not riding their bikes in traffic.

- Encourage smoking, drinking, and general debauchery. Smoking, drinking and debauchery are always profitable, and will keep people coming back every weekend.

- Play 80's music really loud. This really doesn't need much of an explanation. Everyone loves loud 80's music.

Vote for your favorite Best Guest Bloggers Blogfest blog-off

We are very pleased with the turn out and response for our Best Guest Bloggers Blogfest Blog-Off of 2010.  Thank you for everyone who entered the competition.  We will have one next year as well, so start writing your ideas down so you can enter in 2011.

Now it is time to VOTE.  For the next week there will be a poll in the top right of our blog.  Select which one you like the best.  The winner will be announced after the voting is complete.  You have one week to vote, so get out there and vote!

Remember that in the U.S., voting is a right that was earned by people who lost their lives fighting against klansmen, communists, and nazis in various wars. This is a free nation that survives by the hard work of its people. If you do not vote in the guest blog blog-off, then you are an anti-american communist, and we will beat you with folding chairs and rip holes in your Che Guevara t-shirt.

If you submitted a guest blog and you see that it is not receiving many votes, then you need to get all of your friends to visit the site and vote for you.

Guest Blog No. 5: Gas pump

There are a lot of gas stations in the USA.  I'm sure there is one gas station out there that will not notice if an extra gas pump "shows up."  So, to make money find an old gas pump.  They are pretty easy to find.  They can be found in random fields with rusted metal and old farm equipment.  Bring the old pump to a gas station and put it next to all of the other pumps.  No one will notice the rust if you put a "passed inspection" sticker on the pump.  Connect your pump to the gas stations system.  Make sure you use their gas system, but not their money system.  Make sure you keep your credit card machine separate from the gas stations.  People will fill up the gas stations gas with your pump and pay you.

Guest Blog No. 4: Enhance your dollar bill

Business plan:

A) get dollar bill (since it appears the "authors" of howtomakeadollar enjoy ethical "grayness" you can get a dollar by stealing one) (for clarification, howtomakeadollar does indeed support stealing money, but only from people that don't deserve it as much as you do)

B) Enhance your dollar bill (Inappropriate joke in reference to enhancement deleted by howtomakeadollar)

C) There is not a lot of room to enhance the dollar bill on the right side of the bill.  So make sure you fold it so the person you are giving it to in exchange for .92 ounces of gold does not see the un-enhanced part of your dollar bill

D) Save gold under your mattress until it is worth $1,000,000 (after Barack Obama's second term) 

Happy Birthday Tyler!

Happy Birthday Tyler.  This blog is dedicated just for you on your special day.  Hope you have a wonderful birthday!

Congratulations... you have resisted natural selection for one more year.

Guest blogging has been interrupted for one day for a special SHOW YOUR LOVE post.  We will resume  with the guest blog-off tomorrow.  Sorry for the inconvenience of someone having a birthday.


EDIT: Comment from Tyler:
This is kind of a ripoff. I didn't get a poem or a haiku or anything, and I look like a lost tourist in that picture. I think this should cost me 50 cents, max. I bet this took you like a minute to write. Also, "you resisted natural selection for another year" is a very good birthday sentiment, but it is inaccurate in my case. I do not resist natural selection. I am natural selection.

Guest Blog 3: Failed Business Idea

Failed Business Idea: Porn Addiction Advice
(howtomakeadollar appreciates all reader interest and activity.  Unfortunately... some of our readers cannot read directions.  Our guest blogger blog off competition is on who can come up with the best idea on how to make a dollar... not ways at which you have failed to make a dollar.  At howtomakeadollar we do not discriminate based on one's ability to follow directions* so we will allow this blog to proceed.  Howtomakeadollar does however discriminate based only on age, gender, ethnicity and left handed people. Especially age and gender)

A few years ago I came up with what I thought would be a good idea. There are a lot of people on the Internet who use it to look at porn. I imagine that most of these people feel guilty about it and wish they didn't do it. Even if most of them don't feel guilty about it, I imagine that some of them do, and the industry is so big that even if just one percent of the people involved want to quit, you can do pretty well.  Additionally, there are those people who have been caught looking and are in trouble with their spouse.

I figured that a good way to make money would be to create a website that provided advice to porn addicts. My website had a text window on its front page that allowed users to describe their problem and ask for help. Then it took them to a paypal link and charged them $10.

The plan was that once they described their addiction and paid, I would reply with a bunch of advice on how to quit. I would suggest things like moving their computer to a more trafficked room in the house, involvement at a nearby church (lots of churches have porn counseling programs), confidential conversations with trusted friends, and incremental goal setting.

That was the plan

I advertised my website on google, and checked everyday to see how many people were clicking my ads. Unfortunately, the cost per click is very high on google when you use the word "porn." I wound up paying about $80 in advertising without making a single sale. Then I quit.

I had spent about $20 on the domain name "thehelpfulsite.com," and another $150 on hosting. Then I paid a guy $250 to build the website. Then I paid $80 in advertising, and I never made a single sale. The page is still there, sitting empty on the Internet, but it is inactive.

Lessons learned:
1. People like porn
2. People who search for porn expect to find it, not some anti-porn website
3. Some ideas sound good, but aren't
4. You can't help someone overcome porn if they do not want to.

Guest Blog No. 2: Start a bogus cause

It seems these days a lot of people are making money by starting bogus "causes." [Portion deleted by editors for inappropriate mixing of metaphors]... So a good way to make money is to start your own "cause."  Something with polar bears or going green seem to be winners.  It sure did work for [Portion deleted by editors due to bizarre and inappropriate slur against white people and Australians]....

Step by Step plan:
1) Find something that you can make "scientific" claims that everyone will take your word for it.
[steps two through six were deleted by editors because of extreme irrelevance]
7) Convince everyone that if they do not change their ways your "scientific" claims will destroy the earth as we know it
8) Make a device that people can put in their homes and cars to keep this "scientific" claim from happening (devices are not regulated by the FDA... so you can make any claim about them you want to and not get into trouble)
9) Get some children in China to produce your device in an environmentally unfriendly factory
10) Sell your device based on your "scientific" claims and make a huge profit or at least win the Nobel Peace prize

From reading howtomakeadollar I have learned that videos are the key to a successful blog... so in an attempt to help me win the Best guest bloggers blogfest blog-off I have included a video.

Example of how much devotion you can get to help support your cause based on your "scientific" claims.  Do these people not realize TREES ARE AMERICAS GREATEST RENEWABLE RESOURCE?

Guest Blog No. 1: Celebrity Domain Names

A few weeks ago Howtomakeadollar announced that it would host its annual 2010 Best Guest Bloggers Blogfest Blog-off. We are pleased to report a very high turnout of guest bloggers. Each day we will post a new guest blog on this site. We will post the blogs in the order in which they were received, and all readers are free to vote in our poll on the right side of this page. The guest blogger who receives the most votes will win one dollar, and all the losers will have to post a link to Howtomakeadollar on their facebook page, and say something nice about the winner.

Guest blog 1: Celebrity Domains

No one likes their name slandered- in fact, it’s not even protected under free speech (don’t believe me? Google it). But, if your sense of self worth is low enough, or you’re just that desperate to make your first legit buck, you can try to sell celebrities their own domains back to them after you’re done dragging their names through the dirt.

Here’s how to do it:

Identify an upcoming celebrity/teeny bopper/politician. It’s important to make sure they don’t already have a website to their name. Let’s say, for example: Matt Damon.

Purchase the domain name. (in our case, www.mattdamon.com)

Proceed to post offensive material or take unpopular stances on any of the following historical tragedies (some tragedies referenced by guest blogger were deleted due to their grotesqueness):

Lincoln assassination
Pearl Harbor
Apartheid
Holocaust
Clint Howard never quite making it in the big time (darn you, world!)


The following tragedies are filed under “too soon”, but depending on personal preference, you may also use: (all tragedies referenced by the guest blogger have been deleted because they are all definetely "too soon")


Kick off your shoes- you can probably sit back and wait for Matt Damon’s reps to call, at which point you should demand a large sum of money paid to your estate for acquisition of the domain. (portion deleted because of extremely weird reference)

Now that you’ve officially cashed in, it’s time to learn to deal with the following repercussions:

A. A devastating blow to your karma, which may result in you being reincarnated as something other than human and probably a poisonous tree.


B. Officially joining the list of most admired professions, your rank will probably be near the following:

85314367. Dental Hygienist
85314368. Celebrity domain purchaser/seller backer
85314369. Publicist

C. Accepting the fact that you’ll be either killed by associates of the celebrity you’re blackmailing, or more likely, be forced to be on Judge Judy.  (Judge Judy added for comical relief as well as to take the place of another extremely weird reference).

Make money off the NCAA Basketball Tournament

You are probably aware that every March there is a major college basketball tournament of the top 64 college basketball teams in the U.S. I think this tournament is called "March Excitement" or something. I'm sure you know what I'm talking about.

But did you know that there are ways to make money off this tournament?

There are at least two.

1. Make money at the basketball tournament by selling tickets
You may have some Super Bowl tickets left over that no one bought. If so, just cross out where it says "Super Bowl" and then write "Basketball Tournament" on the ticket. You can sell these at the entrance of the basketball arena for a dollar or two. If you don't have any of these tickets, you can buy one from Howtomakeadollar for a dollar. Or you can just donate a dollar to us because you are nice.

If you want to see the original Super Bowl blog with other similar ideas for making money at sporting events, click here.

2. Make money at the basketball tournament by becoming a human advertisement.
   1. Get a tattoo of a major company tattooed on your butt. If you have a large butt, you can get more than one company name tattooed there. This will increase profits.
   2. Go to a basketball game
   3. Wait until no one is looking
   4. If you are wearing any clothes, take them off
   5. Run as fast as you can across the basketball court
   6. Steal the ball from whoever has it. This may be difficult because college basketball players are pretty athletic, but the fact that you are naked may work in your favor here.
   7. Dunk the ball. I see people do this all the time when I watch basketball, so it can't be very hard.
   8. Hang on the rim until officials remove you
   9. Someone at the company will give you a lot of money for advertising.*
If you tattoo "Howtomakeadollar" on your butt and successfully do this stunt, Howtomakeadollar will pay you a dollar, and will award you an honorary title such as "Count" or "Duke" or whatever title you want.

*A good friend of mine has assured me that 83% of all companies in the world will pay you money to do this stunt. He is working on his MBA right now, so I think he knows what he's talking about.






There is still an opportunity to submit a guest blog for Howtomakeadollar's 2010 Best Guest Bloggers Blogfest Blog-off competition. Winner gets cash. Losers get a fungal infection. See rules here. 

Make money by ratting on your friends to the IRS

You may not be aware, but every year the IRS offers a reward to anyone who provides them with information about a person who has evaded taxes. If you turn in someone for tax evasion the IRS will give you a reward of 10% of whatever amount the person owed. Usually this comes to several thousand dollars or more, but sometimes it is in the millions. You will need some basic information about the person, including their social security number. This is for real. You can download the official form here: http://www.irs.gov/pub/irs-pdf/f211.pdf. Warning. This is a real IRS form, and may cause temporary insanity, blindness, and rage. 

There are several ways to cash in on this

1. Find a shady rich person who looks like he doesn't pay taxes. You can usually find this variety of rich person by buying drugs from people. If someone sells you drugs, get their first and last name, their social security number, and their address. Most drug dealers will gladly provide you with this information if you promise that you are not an undercover cop. Then run away and call the IRS. Important: Do not actually use the drugs that you bought. Drugs are bad for you.

2. Pick nine random numbers and add hyphens at a few places, such as 104-39-5301*. Then make up a name and an address, and send it to the IRS. If you do this a couple of times you will probably get someone who has actually evaded some of their taxes. Jackpot.

3. Evade your own taxes. Turn yourself in. Collect reward. This is probably the easiest way, and mathematically, I think you come out ahead.

4. Pick a person who you don't like, ask them for their social security number, and then tell the IRS that they have withheld a couple million in taxes. If you are very friendly with the IRS person, they will probably take your word for it and go ahead and send you the reward before verifying the info. Then they will audit the person, and you can send them taunting text messages from your beach house that you bought with the reward money. Double jackpot!

5. Report the IRS to the IRS. The IRS will then have to investigate itself for fraud. The resulting audit will probably take several decades to resolve itself, and in the meantime you won't have to pay any taxes, and no one else will either. Once it becomes known that you were the genius behind it, lots of people will send you money to thank you. You should forward this money to Howtomakeadollar. When the audit is finally over, you can collect 10% of the U.S. GDP as your reward. This should be enough money for you to buy a motorcycle and drive around the country for a while. Thats what I would do.

*104395301-- I'm pretty sure this is a prime number. If so, everyone on the Internet owes me a dollar. Official Fact Check Guy- Please verify.

How to make two dollars by unionizing against yourself

Howtomakeadollar exists on the premise that very few ideas are worth one million dollars, but there are millions of ideas that are worth one dollar. This premise is a pretty good one, and has been working rather well. We have made about $34 so far. A few days ago I got a calculator out to see if $34 is close to one million, and I discovered that it isn't. In fact, we will have to make a dollar everyday for about 2,739 years before we make a million. This is about a thousand years longer that I expect to live. Additionally, you have to factor in things like inflation, thermodynamics, and radiational cooling*, which reduce our earnings over time. So our whole premise is in question right now.

In light of this fact, Howtomakeadollar has decided to unionize against itself to raise wages and benefits. We are sick of Big Blogging taking profits for itself, and we demand at least two dollars. Our company name will remain the same, but we will now pay ourselves two dollars for every dollar we earn. I'm pretty sure this is how unions work, and it seems to be a pretty good strategy. Which would you rather have? One dollar or two? I really can't see any downside to unionizing.

We've consulted our accountant about this, and he thinks it is an excellent idea, especially for long term growth. Our official fact check guy did not respond, probably because he was in awe of how great an idea it was and did not feel like there was anything he could possibly add to the discussion. You know a good idea when you hear it.

Show your hate!

A few weeks ago we started offering a service called "Show your love." It has been massively successful, and we have been proud to provide fawning poems, hiakus, and love letters to people's wives on their behalf. If you have a loved one, "Show your love" is an excellent service to use. I would like to point out that all the  people who have used this service have been men. I think that at the very least, their wives owe them a "show your love" post as well. You are married to a good man. Remember the pride you felt when you saw that your husband had paid a dollar to get some love poetry written for you? Do you want to be a bad wife who can't even fork over one dollar for your man? Shameful.

We've also offered to write obituaries for people for a dollar, but this has not gone over well, and the one obituary we did write turned out to be premature, because the guy was not actually dead.

You can read our "Show your love" blogs here, and the obituary here

Continuing the theme, we are now offering a "Show your hate" service, or, if "hate" is too strong a word, you can use "show your disgust."

Basically, for one dollar, we will write a ranting tirade against anyone or anything you name. Frequently hated people include politicians, the cast of "Friends," and that Burger King guy. Other things that lots of people hate are kittens, panda bears and seals.

So lets just say that you hate that Burger King Guy. All you have to do is email us, promise to send us $1, and tell us what day you would like us to write bad things about him. You can even specify certain aspects about him that you hate the most. In turn, we will write a rant against that person, place, or thing. Additionally, we will post nasty comments about them on facebook and twitter.

If I had a choice of the top three people to hit in the face with a jackhammer they would be the Burger King guy, the Burger King guy's mom, and the doctor who delivered him safely into this world. He scares children, wears cheap hats, and his beard is fake. Burger King food tastes like roofing shingles mixed with SARS.

One dollar bill basketball

We posted a blog about how to sell a one dollar bill for $2.

One of the dollar bill origami shapes we made was a basketball.  Here at howtomakeadollar we like to share our vast knowledge.  Here is an instructional video on how to create the one dollar origami basketball.



Its so easy even a 2 year old can do it.  Seriously here is a video of a 2 year old making a one dollar origami basketball.



We promote getting kids involved at an early age making money.  So please help the 2 year old who make 3,452 of these basketballs and purchase one here!

Make money promoting your blog in class

Now that you have started your own blog and have a paypal account, you are ready to promote your blog. If you do not have a blog or a paypal account, you should definitely start one.  There are gazillions* of ways to promote your blog, but one good way to do it, that is legal, is to promote your blog in class.

Step by step business plan for promoting your blog legally in class:
1) take a class
     -if you are not in a class you can always show up for a random class
     -if you are no longer the normal age of a student: have a midlife crisis, decide to go back to school, take a business communications class in which you are assigned to give a presentation on anything you want
2) promote your blog
3) people will donate money to you. They may donate money because they think your blog is amazing, or because they make money off all of your brilliant ideas, or because they feel sorry for you that you waste all of your time blogging and are having a mid-life crisis.

Repeat steps 2 and 3 for every class you take.  The donations will start pouring in.

*by "gazillions" I mean at least five

1. Go around the beltway with a can of spraypaint and paint your blog name on everything you can find, such as the HoV lane, overpasses, and people's bumpers (you may need to tailgate really close to do this, and the spraypaint may blow back in your face while you lean out the window, but I don't think you should let this stop you)

2. Find a way to change the Google homepage to your blog. This should increase traffic significantly. I think the Chinese government did something like this recently, so it can't be very hard.

3. Make a youtube video that is called "nude celebrities" and then just play a five minute video of your blog. You can scroll up and down the blog page if you feel that you need a more action-oriented video.

4. Get a cropduster airplane and fly really low over a big city such as Washington D.C. or NYC. This should draw lots of attention. Shout out the window "please visit www.whateveryourblogsnameis.com" at all the people you see. Make sure you say "please" or else they might think you are a crazy wacknut with bad manners.

5. Go to a crowded movie theater with lots of flyers and business cards for your blog. Position yourself at the main entrance, and yell "fire*" really loud. At this point the theater should empty rather quickly. Make sure you give everyone a flyer as they file past you. 

*you do not need to actually start a fire, but it helps.

Are you interested in being a guest blogger for Howtomakeadollar? We are gearing up for our annual Best Guest Bloggers Blogfest Blog-off. Entries are due in the next few days. Winner gets a cash prize, bragging rights, and a free subscription to Howtomakeadollar. Read all the rules here.

How to sell $1 for $2

Howtomakeadollar has posted several times about how to make your own money, how to turn play money into real money, and how to sell a signed copy of the original dollar bill.  This post will describe how to sell $1 bill for $2!

If you would like to sell a one dollar bill for two dollars... there has to be something special about your one dollar bill.  It could either be signed by a famous person, be really old, or be really really new (some people are willing to pay money to trade their old crinkled dollars in for new crisp clean ones... if you are one of these people please email us... we have lots of new dollar bills and shiny pennies and nickels).  Don't worry, if you do not have a special one dollar bill you can make it special!

Everyone loves money origami!  It's true... if you google "how to make a dollar" a bunch of youtube videos and websites dedicated to making origami out of money come up.

Step by step business plan on how to sell a one dollar bill for $2:
1) obtain a real $1 bill*
2) learn origami
3) fold $1 bill into cool origami shape
4) sell cool $1 origami for $2

*Important: make sure it is a one dollar bill.  It would be very sad to accidentally make origami out of a $100 bill and sell it for $2

If you would like to buy your very own $1 bill for $2... today is your lucky day.  We are offering an UNLIMITED number of $1 bill origami.  The shapes you can choose from are bow tie, square, ring, triangle or airplane or basketball.  All of these are pictured below and can be purchased through paypal!

Bow Tie $1 bill origami

Square $1 bill origami

Ring $1 bill origami

Triangle $1 bill origami

 

Airplane $1 bill origami







 

Basketball $1 bill origami

Welcome our new Official Accountant!

Howtomakeadollar recently welcomed our Official Fact Check Guy (OFCG). You can read about it here. 
We are pleased to report that OFCG has become an active commenter on this blog, and has made our blog a significantly more trustworthy source of information. In light of the success of OFCG, we are now pleased to announce the addition of The Official Accountant of Howtomakeadollar. (TOAH)

We corresponded with him over email, and will post this correspondence directly below. I'm sure that after reading his qualifications you will agree that he is an ideal candidate for the job.

>>
Howtomakeadollar needs an official accountant to help cover up a few mistakes and indiscretions on our balance sheet. Since you are not a real accountant, and presumably will not ask many questions, we think you are our top candidate for this job. If you accept it, you will occasionally be asked for advice or input on certain blog posts. Additionally, you will be expected to comment on our blogs whenever you feel that your input is worthwhile, unless you don't feel like it, or if you have other things to do. You can use the nickname "Official Accountant of Howtomakeadollar" in your comments. Please keep your new position a secret. You will not be paid.

thanks

Howtomakeadollar Ethics Board

>> Re: official accountant position at Howtomakeadollar

I am sincerely honored to be chosen as the "Official Accountant of Howtomakeadollar". I can only assume that you chose me due to my highest of ethical standards and passion for complete fiscal transparency that I have demonstrated in my former positions at Sallie Mae, Goldman Sachs and the US Treasury.  I also feel quite certain that when I scrutinize your balance sheet for errors and indiscretions that I will find none, just like when I worked for AIG.  If need be, I can always add a few zeros to the end of any accounts that may, at first glance, appear to be troubled.  I learned this trick from my friend Ben at the Fed.  (this is, by the way, a good way to make a few dollars - just add a zero or 2 after the "1" on a "1 dollar bill". Most people will not notice that the wrong president is on the bill, but I digress).

My only condition is that  you don't ask me any questions about my accounting procedures.  Just show me the balance sheets that you are concerned about, then come back in a few days and breathe a sigh of relief.  No questions necessary.

I accept this position with gratitude!
















Do you think you have what it takes to be a successful business blogger? Howtomakeadollar is now accepting guest blogs for the 2010 Best Guest Bloggers Blogfest Blog-off. The winner will receive a cash prize, fame, and a free* Twitter account. Guest bloggers can enter more than one blog. Read the rules here.


*all twitter accounts are free

Buy Pablo Picasso Signed original

In our research on how to make our own REAL money... we learned something that most people do not know.  Pablo Picasso was the original designer of the one dollar bill.  Luckily for all of our readers we found the last original one dollar bill signed by Pablo Picasso himself.

You can buy the last original one dollar bill signed by Pablo Picasso here for only $1 (plus $0.44 for shipping and handling).

Want to get famous and make money? Enter the 2010 Best Guest Bloggers Blogfest Blog-Off championship for a chance at fame and money. Official rules are here.

Nude Art

We here at howtomakeadollar are very much into the "arts".  As you can see here, here, and here.  Especially when the "arts" can give you an opportunity to make money.  Today, may we present to you just such an opportunity.

1.  Get naked.  Or nude.  However you prefer, just make sure you don't have any clothes on.
2.  Find someone who is painting.  Good places to check are scenic areas, art schools, and inside the homes of artists.
3.  Offer to be their nude model.  They should be willing to accept your offer when they see that you are already nude.  If you need to convince them, demonstrate a few or your "artistic" nude poses.  That should win them over.
4.  After they finish painting your nude portrait, ask them if you can see it.  When they hand it to you, take it and start running.  Since you have no clothes on, you will be able to run very fast. Thats why its called "streaking". If you run with clothes on, its called jogging. I think its obvious which way is faster. In fact, a bunch of running people have proven that you run faster naked.
5.  Find someone to buy the nude art.  This should be easy since everyone loves art and everyone loves nudity.  In fact, I expect an increase in traffic to this blog, just because I used the word "nude" a lot in this post.  It's a guaranteed way to have a successful blog.  Just like pictures and videos.

Related Business Idea:  If you can't find anyone painting, just find anyone.  Chances are when they see that you are nude, they will ask you to put clothes on.  (For some reason it's ok to be nude in great works of art, but not in public places).  Tell them you will re-robe for $8.  (You could try for higher, but in my experience, weirdly specific amounts like 8 or 11 work best).  Of course, the more offended the person is at seeing you naked, the more you can charge.  After you are out of sight, strip and repeat.

Have you heard about the 2010 Best Guest Bloggers Blogfest Blog-Off? This is a chance for you to get famous by submitting a guest blog to Howtomakeadollar. Our readers will vote, and the best guest blogger will receive a cash prize. Click here for the official rules. 

Make money by keeping secrets

Has anyone ever asked you to keep a secret?  Chances are the answer is yes.  Did you make any money off of it?  Chances are the answer is no.  That is unfortunate because you could have made at least $1 off of the situation.

Next time someone asks you "Can you keep a secret?" make sure you make money.  Here's how the conversation should go:

Some guy: "Can you keep a secret?"

You: "Of course I can... please tell me all of your secrets."

Some guy: "Cool... (insert secret here)"

You: "Thanks for telling me your secret... now you need to pay me $1 to ensure I will not tell everyone I know.  And an extra $1 to ensure I do not post it as my status update on Facebook."

Some guy:  "Cool... here's your money... and I'll throw in an extra $1 because you were so honest and up-front with me.  Thanks for being such a good friend."

Now that you have your $3... post a status update on your facebook page saying "I have a secret that (some guy) really does not want me to tell you.  I will tell the secret to the highest bidder."  Sell secret to highest bidder.... most likely it will be TMZ because they want to know all of the secrets in the whole world... no matter who the some guy is.



Have a good idea for making money? Howtomakeadollar is now hosting its annual Best Guest Bloggers Blogfest Blog-off. Email us your idea, and we will publish it on this website. If enough voters vote for it, you will win money and prestige, and people will say nice things about you. See here for all the official rules. 

Become a Guest Blogger

Howtomakeadollar has been overwhelmed with requests from our readers asking us to become a member of our blog team.  Since the process and application of becoming a full time Howtomakeadollar blogger takes at least 6 years to complete we have decided to allow people to become Guest Bloggers.  If you have an idea how to make money and would like to blog about it... we would love to give you the opportunity to post it on our blog.  Email us the idea and we will post it.

We have decided to help incentivize and promote competition by offering the best Guest Blogger $1.  We will allow our readers to vote for the best Guest Bloggers blog.  Whoever receives the most votes from our readers will win the highly coveted "Best Guest Bloggers Blogfest Blog-off 2010 Award," bragging rights, and $1. Losers must update their facebook status with a link to Howtomakeadollar, and must say something nice* about the winner. All participants are encouraged to get all their friends to vote. All forms of cheating, subversion, and ballot rigging are encouraged.

*Howtomakeadollar has a list of compliments that you are free to use
1. [Guest Blogger] is very good at origami
2. [Guest Blogger] offers helpful driving advice
3. [Guest Blogger] is the most competitive member of his bowling league
4. [Guest Blogger] has good posture
5. [Guest Blogger] never exceeds the speed limit
6. [Guest Blogger] is a frequent contributor to Wikipedia
7. [Guest Blogger] never hits the snooze button
8. [Guest Blogger] knows a lot about anime
9. [Guest Blogger] knows lots of clever pick-up lines
10. [Guest Blogger] has many interesting stories to tell

Readers who are interested in entering this contest must email us their entire blog entry 3/15/2010. Guest blogs will appear each day, beginning on 3/15/2010, and will run until we run out of them, or until we think up something else we would rather do. We reserve the right to not publish your blog if we think it
1. Violates our high ethical standards
2. Is based on debatable or unsubstantiated claims that violate our strict truth policy*
3. Is incapable of making at least one dollar

* Howtomakeadollar does not have a truth policy

Additionally, Howtomakeadollar reserves the right to edit and add our own commentary to any guest blog post.

Make money with your children

Howtomakeadollar is a very principled, ethical, and values-driven institution, and one of its primary beliefs is that you should get your children involved in entrepreneurship at an early age. Many people call this child labor, but don't worry. Its not.

We've already written a few blogs about ways to make money with your kids. You can read a few of them here and here. 

Now, starting with yesterday's blog, I want to show you a few more ways. First, you need to read yesterday's blog. You can do that by scrolling down below this blog.

Idea no. 1 for teaching your kids to make money: Make money

Idea No. 2 for teaching your kids to make money: Sell Lemonade

First of all, you need to know that selling lemonade is illegal without a license. However, I don't think you should worry about starting your kid on the path of crime. Most kids in my neighborhood commit several crimes everyday anyway, so you may as well teach them to profit from it. 

Secondly, you should know that traditional lemonade stands are money holes that will never make you rich. The cost of ingredients is simply too high. Howtomakeadollar has a better way

1. Get a ball that is yellow and looks kind of like a lemon. A tennis ball might work. Actual lemons are too expensive and will eat into your profits.

2. Tell your kid to write "LEMONADE 4 SALE" in big, uneven, kid letters on a big piece of paper. 

3. Get a pitcher of water and put it on a table beside the sign.

4. Put the tennis ball in the pitcher

5. Tell your kid to charge people $1 for a cup of lemonade.

6. Do not provide cups. People should use their own cup. This will save you the cost of those little plastic cups, which are prohibitively expensive. Despite the fact that plastic cups provide numerous environmental benefits,* we believe that their cost is the most important factor.

7. If people say that the lemonade is just water with a rubbery flavor, tell your kid to tell them to quit complaining and get off your yard.

8. Take profits from your child

*Pros and Cons of using plastic cups.

Pros:

- Plastic cups have been known to kill baby seals in the Arctic +10

- Plastic cups emit a powerful aroma when burned +1

- Smoke from burning plastic speeds ozone depletion +5

Total: +16

Cons: 

- Extremely expensive. Profit trumps all environmental concerns. +infinity

Total: +infinity

Infinity > 16