Monday, March 15, 2010

Guest Blog No. 1: Celebrity Domain Names

A few weeks ago Howtomakeadollar announced that it would host its annual 2010 Best Guest Bloggers Blogfest Blog-off. We are pleased to report a very high turnout of guest bloggers. Each day we will post a new guest blog on this site. We will post the blogs in the order in which they were received, and all readers are free to vote in our poll on the right side of this page. The guest blogger who receives the most votes will win one dollar, and all the losers will have to post a link to Howtomakeadollar on their facebook page, and say something nice about the winner.

Guest blog 1: Celebrity Domains

No one likes their name slandered- in fact, it’s not even protected under free speech (don’t believe me? Google it). But, if your sense of self worth is low enough, or you’re just that desperate to make your first legit buck, you can try to sell celebrities their own domains back to them after you’re done dragging their names through the dirt.

Here’s how to do it:

Identify an upcoming celebrity/teeny bopper/politician. It’s important to make sure they don’t already have a website to their name. Let’s say, for example: Matt Damon.

Purchase the domain name. (in our case,

Proceed to post offensive material or take unpopular stances on any of the following historical tragedies (some tragedies referenced by guest blogger were deleted due to their grotesqueness):

Lincoln assassination
Pearl Harbor
Clint Howard never quite making it in the big time (darn you, world!)

The following tragedies are filed under “too soon”, but depending on personal preference, you may also use: (all tragedies referenced by the guest blogger have been deleted because they are all definetely "too soon")

Kick off your shoes- you can probably sit back and wait for Matt Damon’s reps to call, at which point you should demand a large sum of money paid to your estate for acquisition of the domain. (portion deleted because of extremely weird reference)

Now that you’ve officially cashed in, it’s time to learn to deal with the following repercussions:

A. A devastating blow to your karma, which may result in you being reincarnated as something other than human and probably a poisonous tree.

B. Officially joining the list of most admired professions, your rank will probably be near the following:

85314367. Dental Hygienist
85314368. Celebrity domain purchaser/seller backer
85314369. Publicist

C. Accepting the fact that you’ll be either killed by associates of the celebrity you’re blackmailing, or more likely, be forced to be on Judge Judy.  (Judge Judy added for comical relief as well as to take the place of another extremely weird reference).

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