Ok everybody. The last Swine Flu post seems to have gone over pretty well, so here is a special bonus idea for our loyal reader.
Business Idea: "Non-Swine Flu Pork"
How the Business Works
1. Get on NPR.
2. Break a story in which you make unsubstantiated claims that all pork contains Swine Flu. Speak in a soft, clear, and disinterested tone about how the meat industry has kept this a secret. Refer to the meat industry as "Big Pork."
3. Suddenly pork and ham will become extremely inexpensive
4. Buy as much of it as you can afford
5. Slap a label on it that says "Now with 0% Swine Flu!"
6. Sell it to a hippie food store for three times what you bought it for.